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As a wise woman once said…

Come the zombie apocalypse, I’m going to be in demand. Well, if this works, I will. Gentle readers, there might be soap.

Not, of course, the soap I was planning on making, because FedEx is, as far as I can tell, a company composed entirely of asshats. They were supposed to deliver my oils and smellygood fragrance oil on Friday. Instead of delivering my package, the delivery driver fraudulently marked it “Delivery Exception – Incorrect House Number”. Right. So I checked the site I’d ordered from, and I’d given them the right house number. I called FedEx, tracking number in hand, and asked what address was on the package. According to their system, it was the correct house number. I am forced to assume the FedEx driver for the back of beyond here just decided he didn’t feel like visiting the Manor of Mixed Blessings that day. The customer service person I spoke to told me that there was no way I could possibly have my package until Monday despite the fact that I’d planned my Sunday around soap.

Then Saturday, on my way home from class, what did I see? A FedEx truck out making deliveries, five miles from the Manor. Right. I am so done with FedEx and any company who forces me to use them at this point. In the past four packages I’ve had delivered via FedEx, I’ve had horrifying problems with two of them. That is not a good ratio. On the other hand, I’ve had a blue million packages delivered via UPS, and can put it out of my mind because the boxes always arrive safely, in good condition, handed over by a driver who always has a smile and a kind word.

So at any rate, on our Sunday grocery trip I picked up a kilogram of olive oil, and made a side trip to A. C. Moore for smellygood. And I made soap, I think. The scum of it in the bowl after I mixed it was trying desperately to foam when I was cleaning my implements with the help of cleaning exec, which is a good sign! You can also visit Janitor Supplies Brisbane for more online cleaning services. Now if the stuff I poured will just harden, I am a happy happy camper. On the other hand, it’s still got to sit for 3-4 days at least before I can pop it out of the molds, and then it has to sit for a month after that to cure, so I still won’t be USING handmade soap, even if this worked, until mid-December. At which point I may just decide to wrap it in home-made paper, tie it with hand-spun yarn, and say “MARTHA STEWART CAN BITE ME” and also “OH LOOK CHRISTMAS PRESENTS.” Ahem.

At any rate, I have chickens. And I might have soap. I think my best beloved is planning on making homemade bread this week, too. Come the zombie apocalypse, we are going to be set.

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